The Passionate Listener

Have you ever seen the movie “Mom’s Night Out”? I have, and after a conversation about it again today, I decided to pop it into the DVD player and watch it. As I watched, I was once again inspired by the same scene that brought tears to my eyes when I first watched it last year. And again, I felt the same emotions the main character did in the movie.

“I’m a failure. I have failed again, that’s all I do. I had a plan, but……instead…”

“I can’t get in front of it. No matter how hard I try, no matter how much I give. I’m just not enough.”

Have you ever thought this?
Have you ever felt this way?
Have you ever just collapsed down onto your hands and knees, crawling into the fetal position, crying out to God and beating yourself up for not being good enough?

Have you then started to ask God all those “why” questions?

  • Why did you make me look the way I do?
  • Why did you make me think the way I do?
  • Why did you make me act the way I do?
  • Why did you make me dream the way I do?

I have struggled with all of these feelings before, and I have asked these same questions on multiple occasions. I still will have these moments of break down while trying to figure out my life, my path, and where I am going. All I want to do is what God wants of me and to go where God wants me to go. But I let the self-doubt and negative thoughts rule over me. I let them tell me that I am not enough, I am not good enough, smart enough, skilled enough, prepared enough… the list could go on forever.

BUT…the question is…

Who are you not enough for?

That’s the ultimate question, and the same question asked in the movie.

The answer…

For you…you are not enough for you.

And want to know why I question God so much and find myself not good enough?

I compare myself to other Christians. I compare myself to others that I believe are better. I compare myself to those I believe are stronger and more equipped. I compare myself to those that I believe are more talented and outgoing. I believe that they are more able to “please” God with all those “better” things I see in them.

“Each of you must examine your own actions. Then you can be proud of your own accomplishments without comparing yourself to others.  Assume your own responsibility.” – Galatians 6:4-5

And yet…I still cannot find the answers in these moments. I cannot find the answers because I do not believe in myself. I do not have faith in myself. And I do not feel good enough with my own talents and abilities to do anything of substance or worth.

The moment that those questions CAN be answered, is when we TRUST in God and know that He created each and every one of us individually and with different talents, abilities and strengths. God so graciously gave us our minds, our bodies, our strengths, our abilities and our whole entire lives because He knew in advance He would need all our specific “pieces and parts” at a precise already planned moment in the future. And it all would be for His glory, not ours.

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” – Jeremiah 1:5

“In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly.” – Romans 12:6-8

“God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another. Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen.” – 1 Peter 4:10-11

So you need to be who God made you to be…YOU!

No one is like you, no one can do what you do and no one can live life and share Jesus like you can in this exact place and exact time.

God loves you!

He will always love you just for being you.

We all spend so much time beating ourselves up. It becomes so exhausting doesn’t it? Um, yes, very exhausting!

I want to end with some encouragement from the previously mentioned movie. I may have changed some wording, but it all was inspired by the script.

I doubt the good Lord made a mistake giving you the life He gave you or the abilities. So just be you. He’ll take care of the rest.

This means when you say “I am a failure”, that is 100% FALSE!!!”

I am not perfect, you are not perfect. I make plenty of mistakes, you make plenty of mistakes. But we are right where God wants us to be and He has given us everything we need to be exactly who He created us to be. We just have to believe it and own it!

I’m a mess, you are a mess, but we are His beautiful mess. He loves us. And we belong to Him.

We are His masterpiece and that is ENOUGH!

Tara Neidert

Tara is single and lives in North Canton Ohio with her 9 year old Boston Terrier, Zoe. She grew up in the small town of Hartville with her parents and two brothers. She is a registered nurse and an avid “Bootcamper” at her local gym. She enjoys spending time with family and friends, attending Bible studies, accountability groups and serving on team for The Walk to Emmaus and at her local church. She is also a sports fanatic and a huge lover of Christian music. She has attended many concerts, but her love for Fireflight has landed her at 40+ concerts. Many of her friends would describe her as loyal, faithful, determined and steadfast. Tara understands the hardships of living as a Christian and seeking God’s Will for ones life. It’s been a constant struggle, but she knows that “God doesn’t call the prepared, He prepares the called.”


1 comment to The Passionate Listener

  • Tina McIntire

    You brought tears to my eyes with this. Ouch.. those anguished questions hurt and I’ve asked them so many times! It’s difficult to accept that Father has a unique purpose and plan for me right where I am right now. I’m so very flawed. And I love this song! It all brings to mind another song, “Glow in the dark” by Jason Gray,

    Don’t be ashamed of your past
    If you’re shattered like a piece of glass
    The more broke you are the more the light gets through
    Show your wounds and your flaws
    Show them why you still need the cross
    Let them see the work He’s doing in you