You're back - I'm glad! Sometimes I worry that the words that I write will make people say "I'm not going to read her stuff anymore!" In fact I had one dear friend tell me that what I'd written made her SO angry - she thought I'd written it about her. I hadn't. The words I write are lessons God is teaching ME! If He is teaching you the same lesson then we have more in common than either of us realized! Hey friend - you wanna walk this path to good health with me?

Last week we looked at John chapter 5, the story about the guy that was stuck on his mat, crippled by a disease/illness/dilemma that left him paralyzed; recognizing where the answer could be found but not able to get himself there.

Jesus gave him this answer: "GET UP, pick up your mat and walk".

So how does that apply to us today? Well, to me it says we need to be willing to be part of the solution. It's not enough to recognize the problem, it's not enough to know where the answer lies. We must GET UP and do our part in pursuing health - physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

So what keeps us from getting up? What keeps us from being healthy? What lies behind the word "Yes, but" in our response to the question Jesus asks: "Do you want to be healthy?"

Fear? "Yes, but I'm afraid?"

Shame? "Yes, but if I ask for help what will people think?"

Pride? Denial? Feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to start? I shudder to think that part of the problem could be laziness, or ignorance. Those are not words I really want used to describe anything that I'm a part of.

What about ambivalence, anger, bitterness, or jealousy? The old "it's not fair" card gets pulled out frequently when we see something that we think should be ours but for whatever reason it's not, and it often becomes an excuse for not doing what it takes to be where we want to be.

I'm pretty sure none of those are listed in Galatians 5, the scripture that defines the fruits of the spirit.

But I have a feeling if we look at those fruits the lack of them will hold some answers:

Love - the lack is ambivalence, just don't care, hatred, hostility

Joy - the lack is bitterness, depression, sadness, sorrow, grumpiness

Peace - the lack is war, a battle, anger, despair, discord, discontentment, anxiety

Patience - the lack is, well, impatience - if we can't have it now then why bother?

Kindness - unkindness, rudeness, meanness, bitterness probably plays a part here again

Goodness - when good is absent what you have left is evil, ungodliness, impurity

Faithfulness - unfaithfulness, cheating, disloyalty, deceit, pretense, laziness

Gentleness - without it there is harshness, no tolerance of those who need or offer help, roughness

Self-control - oh my, well without self-control there's all kinds of junk, much of it beginning with the word "over" over-eating, over-spending, over-extending (as in filling a day with more than can possibly be accomplished), undisciplined behavior

Honestly, I think in each of those opposites we can see reasons that keep us from being healthy.

Perhaps the greatest lesson to be learned from this scripture is that we have to have FAITH in the One Who asks us the question and tells us to walk!

If we don't trust that God is for us, if we don't believe that Jesus came to heal our deepest need, if we don't have confidence that the Holy Spirit is living IN us, giving us strength to get thru the pain and darkness, we will be stuck in our own strength, bearing our own bitter fruit instead of bearing the fruit of the spirit that is a by-product of the power of Christ living in us.

The fruit of the spirit grows in us as we grow in Christ. As we WALK by faith with Him. Walking by faith is an exercise in and of itself - and lets face it, faith is much like a muscle, it needs to be used in order to stay in shape!

But first we still have to answer the question "Do you want to be well?"

If the answer is yes then today is the day we need to seek the wise counsel that will help us, once and for all, pick up our "mat", (or get off our couch) and WALK!

Until next time.

Beth

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I've been studying John chapter 4 thanks to the Meet Me At the Well conference last weekend. This week I decided to keep reading on into John chapter 5. Do you know the story? It's where a man who was lame (Webster says: crippled, having an injury that makes one limp; stiff and painful; poor, ineffectual) had been laying by the waters of Bethesda waiting for the waters to "stir" because when that happened whoever got into the water first found healing.

That's where Jesus found him, beside the pool, waiting, but never getting in. Jesus asked him a very compelling question, "Do you want to be well?"

He didn't answer yes or no, instead he told Jesus why he couldn't do what it took to get well. He couldn't get himself there in the state he was in.

I find Jesus's answer as compelling as his original question. He didn't say "let me carry you there." Nope, Jesus answered him "Get up! Pick up your mat and walk!"

There are lessons to be learned in those simple words.

The first lesson can be found in Jesus's straightforward question: "Do you want to be well?"

The lesson is about honesty, being honest with the Lord, and with ourselves. "Do you want to be well?" That's a direct question that can only be answered with a yes or a no.

If we say yes then we need to be willing to do what we're told. "Get up!" Do what it takes to get to where you know you need to be.

If we say "Yes, but..." we have rationalized why we cannot get ourselves to where we know we need to be.

I doubt that we ever say, "No, I don't want to be well", but our actions speak louder than our words. What about when we respond, "Yes, of course I want to be healthy!" and then do nothing? Or what if we simply refuse to answer the question?

What would Jesus have said to the paraplegic if he had given those responses?

Perhaps we see a bit of the answer in Matthew 19:16-22 when He talks to the rich young man who asks what he must do to get eternal life yet is unwilling to do what it takes to have it.

Jesus speaks truth, whether we are willing to follow it or not.

And it is our loss when we choose to ignore the truth He has spoken.

The second lesson to be learned is in His answer: "Get up!" Pick up your mat and walk!" Few of us lie around on mats anymore; perhaps today he would say "Get up! Get off your bed/couch/chair/duff and walk!"

If we recognize that we have an ongoing problem, an issue, an illness, an addiction, a dilemma that keeps resurfacing and we keep rationalizing it all away, we are like the guy on the mat. We know we are missing out on being healthy, and we are stuck in that un-healthy place.

Recognizing the problem is only half the battle; we still have to be willing to do what it takes to start the process of healing. The doctor is probably not going to come to us. Neither is the counselor, or the personal trainer, or the organizational coach, or the friend that can walk beside us on the road to good health.

We have to GET UP and do what it takes. We are responsible to take those first steps, to walk, to pursue health - physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

So what keeps us from getting up? What keeps us from being healthy?

Hmmmm. Perhaps we should ponder that one over the next week.

Here's the challenge: write down the issue that is keeping you on your "mat". What is it that has you "crippled" - physically, emotionally/relationally, or spiritually? Think about it, ask God to help you be honest with yourself and with Him.

We need to recognize what is keeping us "mat-bound". And then we need to allow Jesus's words to penetrate our hearts, "Do you want to be healthy?"

And if our answer is "Yes, but." we need to recognize it as an opportunity to examine what it actually is that is keeping us stuck on the mat.

I have a feeling God's word will point us in the right direction there too!

Until next time..

Beth

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I love reading what my friends are writing. Yet every once in a while I find they've written about ME! Hey guys, that was not in the job description! I'm a wife, mom, sister, daughter, friend, employee, and ministry partner - not an example for you to write about!

But perhaps it is in our job description when we look in God's word about the example we are to set. "Be careful how you live, not as fools, but as those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity for doing good in these evil days; don't act thoughtlessly but try to understand what the Lord wants you to do." (Ephesians 5:15) No, it doesn't say "because your actions will be written up in devotional form by your friends" but the warning to be careful is there because others are watching, whether we realize it or not!

My friend Becki was watching and listening one day recently as my radio pals and I interviewed Jocelyn Hamsher about her newly published Bible Study "Meet Me At The Well" for the Circle of Friends radio program. You can read about that day in Becki's February 5th devotional entitled "God Is". Becky writes about how Joc turned the tables on us and asked each one of us the question "How did you see God as a child?"

When Jocelyn spoke those words a visual immediately popped into my mind. It was God's hand, His finger was pointing at me, and I was in trouble. Yes, the God of my childhood was all about catching me doing wrong - again. He was the God of judgment.

I'm thankful Joc didn't stop there; she proceeded to ask the next question, "How do you see God today?" And you want to know something really neat? The God I know today doesn't point and shake His finger at me accusingly. Instead He turns His hand palm up and beckons me with that same finger. "Come" He says. He is the God of all grace.

Sometimes He wants me to come because He needs to teach me, to show me how can I do things differently, His way. His hand of correction is still there, it is just tempered, in my heart, by His mercy, His grace, His great love for His child - me!

Sometimes He wants me to come simply because He knows I am so weary I cannot go on. He wants to give me rest.

Sometimes He wants to point me toward another one of His children. He asks me to be His arms, His hands, His feet.

Whatever it is He wants for me, in me, from me, He wants it for my good, and for His glory.

My friend Lisa recently recorded a song simply named "Come" (Clay Heathcock (c) 2002 Feet of Clay) It is on a companion CD to Meet Me At The Well, the book that Virelle Kidder has written, as well as the companion Bible Study we were interviewing Jocelyn about.

The lyrics are:

"Come - All who are thirsty come

Come - All who are thirsty come

Come - All who are thirsty come

Come where waters flow - come

Come - All who are weary come

Come - All who are weary come

Come - All who are weary come

Come that you may rest - come

Come and know unfailing love

Come and find shelter and shade

The Lord is my strength and my song

Come and bow down

Come - All who are lonely come

Come - All who are lonely come

Come - All who are lonely come

Come into His arms - come

Come and know unfailing love

Come and find shelter and shade

The Lord is my strength and my song

Come and bow down

Come and bow down"

That's it, He simply beckons us to come. He does the rest, and gives us His rest in the process.

Living Water, for all of us who are thirsty, lonely; His word promises rest for our souls, unfailing love, shelter, shade, strength, a song. He delights in us! And He is FOR us!

What a good God we serve!

Until next time,

Beth

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Living life in a circle of friends; what does is really mean?

It probably means different things to different people at different times in their lives.

For one gal I know living life in a circle of friends - specifically college friends - meant being accepted when they wanted to accept her; and being rejected when they didn't want her around.

For that young woman her "circle of friends" was a bad example of how to love well, yet it was a good example of how NOT to treat your friends. It was also a catalyst for change in the young woman's life - proving once again that good things can come from bad circumstances.

For one college gal life in her circle of friends is wonderful. Another has told me she travels to a neighboring college each weekend to find a circle of friends that she feels able to be herself in.

For a dear friend it meant being loved and accepted as long as she was a part of the circle; but when life took her along a different path the parting left her feeling forgotten and abandoned.

For a former high school classmate it means spreading the "glue" of friendship frequently to keep the circle from falling apart.

For me it means having friends to do life with, to minister with, to laugh with, to pray with, to give love to, and to be loved by.

What about you? No doubt you have a circle of friends.

Is it a big circle, or a small one? Is a deep circle, or a shallow one? Is it filled with friends from the past, only new friends, or a mix of both? Is it full of family members - or not so much!

Each one of these components tells us a lot about ourselves, and much about our friends.

One of the best books I have read regarding healthy relationships is the book "Boundaries" by John Townsend and Henry Cloud. Honoring healthy boundaries is the foundation of healthy relationships. The book helped me to see where I was healthy and where I wasn't - 'cause lets face it, a circle of friends is as healthy, or unhealthy, as the friends who make up the circle and I am one of those friends!

I didn't set out to mention The Big 3 in this blog, but I find myself right back there again.

Your friendships are probably about as healthy as you are. So how are you doing - physically, emotionally, and spiritually?

Are you being intentional about getting and/or staying healthy? Are you in need of a little spiritual refreshment?

I want to take this opportunity to personally invite you to the 5^th annual Circle of Friends women's conference, "Meet Me at the Well", Saturday, February 27th, 2010, in Wooster, Ohio. Featured speaker is nationally known writer and conference speaker, Virelle Kidder. (You might have heard of her, I've mentioned her a time or two - or three - in Confessions of a Peace Lover.)

The doors open at 7:30am, conference starts at 9am and the day ends at 4pm. Tickets are only $10 and include a continental breakfast along with a wonderful day of encouragement, worship, and being together in a great circle of friends! Tickets can be ordered here on the web-site or from the COF office at 330-852-0000.

Maybe you and your "circle" should plan to come? Or perhaps you just need a day "alone in a crowd" to refresh and renew your spirit. Wherever you find yourself please know we would LOVE to have you join our circle of friends as we meet our Savior at the well!

The Well

(recorded by Lisa Troyer, Meet Me At the Well; The Well - Jeremy Johnson and Michael Boggs (c) 2010 McKinney Music, Inc. (BMI) Upsurge Music L.L.C. a division of Amplify Music Group, L.L.C. ASCAP (admin. by LifeWay Worship)

"Are you thirsty? Are you searching?

Are you longing, for His mercy?

Come To The Well; Drink living water

Come and be filled with the love of the Father

Wherever you are, wherever you've been,

Come to the well; never thirst again

Bring your worries, all your hurting

To the place where Grace is flowing

Come as you are, as you are, come"

Until next time.

Beth

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Calling all Tuscarawas and surrounding county Prom-age girls and their moms! Monday, February 15, Safe Kids Tuscarawas is sponsoring a Prom Showcase and Dress Resale Event at the Dover Alliance Church from 4 to 7 pm. The night promises to be a great time for all who attend! For more information call 330-339-2337.

And while you're there stop by the GIRLFriends table and say "HI" to the Director of the Circle of Friends ministry to teens, Denise Anderson!

When I look back on friendships that God has brought into my life thru the years I am so thankful that Denise is one that He has blessed me with in the past decade. She is the motivating force behind the GIRLFriends ministry. Denise has a passion for young people that is contagious, uplifting, and inspirational! Between our two families we have 11 children - she has four daughters and two sons, I have four daughters and one son.

Now, do the math for just a minute, we each have four daughters, that's a total of eight girls, they all either have gone, are going, or will be going to high school someday. That's a minimum of SIXTEEN proms (providing they only go as juniors and seniors) and once we get them thru high school we're looking at the possibility of eight weddings!

We are all about resale events! And when you combine one with an event that features cost-saving prom night ideas as well as tips to encourage girls in the journey thru the teenage years it was a no-brainer when asked if GIRLFriends would like to participate.

Thank you Safe Kids Tuscarawas for sponsoring this annual event!

Until next time,

Beth

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Welcome to February! The past two weeks we have looked at two of the big three health issues that impact our lives - that of physical and emotional health. This week let's take a look at our spiritual health, where it's at, and where it's going. If we are not intentional about the direction we are traveling there is a very good chance we will end up someplace we never intended to be!
Recently I read the book "I Am Not, But I Know I AM" by Louie Giglio. The first paragraph of the book says: "Life is the tale of two stories-one finite and frail, the other eternal and enduring. The tiny one - the story of us - is as brief as the blink of an eye. Yet somehow our infatuation with our own little story - and our determination to make it as big as we possibly can - blinds us to the massive God Story that surrounds us on every side."

Those words stopped me in my tracks. Am I absorbed in my story to the point that I am missing out on God's story that is taking place all around me? Or am I being intentional about looking for His story in the daily occurrences of my life? Where is my focus?

Honestly, I think most of us know better than to think our story is THE story, but the way we live our lives, the busy-ness that keeps us from God's very best, is the tell-tale sign that we think our stuff, our business and our busy-ness, is THE story. Quite frankly, if we are not taking time to include God in our day we are living our lives for ourselves.

As followers of Christ, as children of God, as His people living out our lives in the place that He has allowed us to be for such a time as this, we need to make every effort to see less of ourselves, and more of Him. Louie Giglio writes: "The way we figure it, the world doesn't need more stars - that is, not if the story we are a part of already has one. So if there really is just one Star, our challenge is not so much to shun the spotlight as it is to redirect any bright light that comes our way onto Him. Success would mean people loving Him more than any of us, clamoring for His touch more than ours."

I think most of us would say that is our goal - less of me, more of Him; light shining on Him, not myself. Yet again I would ask, are we being intentional about saturating our hearts, our lives, our days, with Him, so that when people see us what they really see is an overflow of Him? Or is He getting what is left of our day or our week, after all the other stuff of life has been taken care of?

Simply put, do you read God's word when you have time, or do you MAKE time to read God's word? The same question can be asked of intentional prayer time. Is it prayer on the run, or a time of being still before God? If we don't make time in our lives to be still before our Lord our words may say "less of me, more of Him" but our lives say "there's so much of me I don't have time for Him."

Without healthy growth in our lives we will be so stuck in our own story that His-story will be secondary. And that is not where we want to be, and it is not where God wants us to be.

Ask yourself: "Is God first in my life, or does He simply get what's left - if there's anything left?" Be honest in your answer. You know the truth; no excuses need to be given when answering yourself! Either God IS an intentional part of your day, or He is not. If you recognize the need for change ask an accountability partner to hold you to account in that area. And if you are on track have them keep asking the questions of accountability in order to continue on the path of healthiness!

And while the best time and place to get spiritually healthy is in an intimate, intentional, daily time with God, emotional AND physical healthiness can often be achieved in brisk walks with a friend!

Until next time.

Beth

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"...body, mind, and spirit are one complete package. When one part suffers, the whole person suffers." "Meet Me at the Well" Virelle Kidder

Please bear in mind I am not a counselor, I'm simply a woman - a wife, mom, daughter, sister, employee, friend - trying to live life guided by God's word, guarded by His Holy Spirit, and surrounded by people He's summoned here for such a time as this!

Did you catch that? "Surrounded by people" - none of us are here on this earth alone. That is the first clue that God did not want us to try to live life "alone". In fact, it was the very reason that after He created man He also created woman. Everything else up to that point was good. Check out Genesis 1, every time He creates it reads "And God saw that it was good". Then we get to Genesis 2, verse 18: "The Lord God said, 'It is not good for man to be alone'." Not good to be alone? Wow! God created us for relationship!

Our relationships are key components to our emotional health - as well as our emotional unhealthiness!

I don't know where you are in this area of your life, but I do know where I was, and where I am today.

More than a decade ago I was an overwhelmed mom of four, probably living life outwardly looking pretty healthy. But I was shriveling up and dying inside. As I look back thru my journals I recognize the earmarks of depression. At that point I had friends, lots of friends, but what I didn't have was accountability in my friendships. We had fun, but no one was digging deeper to see what was going on underneath the big picture. It wasn't my friends fault! I had not given anyone permission to ask the tough questions, and my personality was, (perhaps at times still is) to make a joke out of something that had the potential to go somewhere I wasn't comfortable going.

That's how I handled it. Someone with a different personality, given the same set of circumstances, would not have made a joke; they would simply have gotten offended and put a wall of silence up between themselves and the person who was digging a little too deep. Another may have responded in anger driving relationships away. Each one of us has coping techniques that we rely on when conversations go where we don't want them to go!

Do you see yourself in any of those scenarios? We are created for relationship and communication, or lack thereof, can make or break a relationship. Healthy relationships, with healthy communication, are a huge part of being healthy emotionally.

God did not create us to be isolated. He created us to be part of a community. No, we don't have to be, in fact we can't be, best friends with everybody. But He created us to be in close relationship with a few key people in our lives. How do I know this? Because He created us in His image and He is a triune God! Think about it - Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. The Trinity is our first example of a healthy, intimate relationship.

He created us - first and foremost - to be in relationship with Himself, but we are walking this earth today with folks that He has placed here too. God's word is full of great wisdom regarding our relationships! It tells us to "encourage one another, build each other up". (1Thessalonians 5:11) That sounds pretty relational to me. It says we are to "speak truth in love", hmmm, hard to do without a relationship in place. (Ephesians 4:5)

I think He probably knew what He was doing, don't you? So how are you living that out? Are you trying to live life alone? Figuring it out by yourself?

Have you allowed someone who loves you enough to speak truth, sometimes hard truth, into your life?

Do you have someone who can ask you "How are you today?" Someone who will not accept "Fine, thanks" as an answer?

Do you have someone that you can be honest and real in front of - even if honest and real is rather ugly?

Do you have someone to cheer you on when the going gets tough?

Do you have someone to laugh with?

Do you have someone who will ask "How's that situation going? Have you done anything to make things right? Are you still offended, angry, avoiding?"

When we don't have a couple of people with whom we can be ourselves typically one of
two things happen; either we will tell everybody our story, laying out our baggage
for ALL to see, (it's what causes people to say  "oh dear, here she comes again")or
we will pack up all that baggage into our hearts, and it will weigh us down - in fact,
it may have the potential to become garbage, toxic garbage - and keep us from being healthy
emotionally. 

I know this is true because I've been there.

But remember, if you want someone to speak real truth into your life the first step is
to ask them to do so - and the next step is to respond graciously the first time they
share their perspective. Another step is to keep meeting, schedule an hour into your
week to meet. Make it a priority! Just as physical exercise is needed to keep your body
fit, the emotional exercise of intentional communication is needed to keep your mind fit!

My pastor says "you're as sick as your secrets".

Why do we keep secrets? Usually because we're afraid of what will happen if people really knew.

I think the evil one knows that. I suspect he keeps us bound up in our fear, and in our pride, 'cause he knows that God's plan is best. If the evil one can keep us from the healthy relationships that lead to emotional healthiness he has won a major battle. We are truly as sick as our secrets. Those secrets fill our hearts and minds with toxic waste. It seeps into every aspect of our lives whether we realize it or not. It steals our joy, kills our relationships, and often robs us of the energy we need to be physically healthy.

We are created in God's image, created for relationship, healthy, Bible-based, God-driven, relationships.

It's what makes the "mind" leg of our 3-legged stool healthy and strong.

For those of you who have not had the opportunity to read Virelle Kidder's book I encourage you to do so! Call your local library and order a copy or head to your favorite Christian book store to purchase it, but whatever you do take time to read it! It is written as a 30 day devotional but if you're like many of us who have already read the book you'll finish it much sooner than that! It is full of real life encouragement.

Until next time.

Beth

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Here we are, three weeks in to the new year, I trust you've gotten the year off to a good start - taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually - exercising, eating right, taking time to be in God's word, talking with Him, learning from Him, and meeting in accountability with your accountability partner(s) so that life won't get in the way of healthy growth! Unhealthy "growth" often happens when we don't exercise, when we fail to eat right, and when we can't find time to be in God's word or in relationship with Him and His people!

Part of living life to the full is conscientiously taking care of the big three health issues in our lives, (think of a 3 legged stool, if one leg breaks you end up on the floor!) that of physical, emotional, and spiritual health. In the book "Meet Me at the Well" author Virelle Kidder puts it this way, ".body, mind, and spirit are one complete package. When one part suffers, the whole person suffers."

With that in mind I've decided to take a closer look at each component of "The Big 3", beginning with physical health. Since I've previously written about my determination to exercise, as well as my lack of passion in doing it, I've decided to invite my friend Kim Mast-Wagler from Impulse Training in North Canton, Ohio, to offer her wisdom, insight and passion on the subject.

Kim writes:

One of the things I tell my clients is that you don't have to have ANY equipment at all to get a good workout in. The biggest key for a beginner is just getting started. (5-10 minutes for a week and keep raising that 5 minutes until you are where you want to be; 45-60 minutes 5 days per week is optimal) Also, pushups and squats are the BEST total body exercises that you can possibly do! During your favorite one hour show try to alternate 10 pushups (for upper body and core), 10 squats (for lower body), and 10-30 jumping jacks (for cardio), and grab water and rest during the commercials. You can raise these reps if they are too easy.

Walking/jogging has always been my go to method of exercising. It is a great way to clear your mind, give yourself the attention you need and help organize your thoughts for the day. Try starting slow with 10 minutes and increase it 1-2 minutes per day until you have reached 30-60 minutes. Also, grab an accountability buddy! Someone who you know will be there for you and will be happy for you as you reach your goals. (Just a little hint, spouses are generally terrible at this as are friends who are also trying to reach the same goals you are. This is not always the case but if you are trying to lose weight and your accountability buddy is also it can be frustrating to one if the other is successful and the other is not.) My friend often encourages me to continue to be faithful with my devotions while I encourage her in her weight loss. It works great because we never get jealous of each other and are genuinely thrilled when one reaches a hard earned goal!

My perfect morning would be to get up around 5:30 am, grab a handful of trail mix, take a light jog (30 min-45 min.), shower and sit down with a delicious egg sandwich and a coffee and read my devos and spend some time with The Man who understands me and loves me more than anyone! (Also, give my husband a kiss as he runs off to work ;) Then have my son run out and say, "Mommy, I waked up!" and get to spend an hour or so getting him ready for the day. We are so blessed and yet so many of us don't realize it because we don't take care of ourselves and we get overwhelmed to the point that life looks bleak instead of us being able to recognize the goodness the God has placed all around us.

I would encourage everyone to take those 10-15 minutes each day to spend exercising - and do it for yourself! Your renewed spirit and confident attitude will shine through and make everything feel less stressful.

So there you have it, a beginner's guide to starting on the road to being physically healthy. If you have more questions for Kim you can email her at impulsetrainers@yahoo.com. She is a great encourager and knows first hand the benefit of physical, emotional, and spiritual healthiness.

Thanks Kim for sharing your passion with us!

Honestly, at least for me, the renewed spirit and confident attitude is as much of the gain as being physically fit. When we don't feel good about ourselves it shows in our attitude and in our lack of determination to take care of ourselves! It always amazes me how when I am exhausted, even fighting a headache, a 20 minute walk (a walk that I am certain I am too tired to take) will leave me feeling better than I felt before. It makes no sense to me; I consider it to be one of those mysterious ways that God likes to work!

Next week we will look at the second leg of "The Big 3", emotional health - keeping our minds healthy and strong, even in the midst of a busy life!

Until then.

Beth

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I've been thinking a lot about garbage lately, or perhaps I've simply been thinking about a lot of garbage! Real, and figuratively, a family of seven can create a lot of garbage. Our recycling bag is full and my hubby has been making lots of trips to the dumpster to get rid of all the trash that's been generated as we celebrated Christmas, New Years, and Clay's 9^th birthday!

Nice thing to be talking about on a brisk January morning, eh? Well, bear with me. All the garbage that my husband has worked so hard to keep under control has made me think about the garbage of life. Can you relate? Do you keep a garbage can in your life? I'm not talking about the one in our kitchen or garage, the one that gets emptied regularly.

The one I'm talking about is a garbage can for our emotions. It's a garbage can filled with hurts and offenses. Instead of dumping the garbage and washing out the can on a regular basis we sometimes chose to allow it to accumulate; we keep a lid on it and hope we never have to deal with the junk at the bottom of the can. For whatever reason, reasons maybe even we don't fully understand, we just don't want to, or perhaps simply cannot, get rid of all the stuff we've placed in that can.

Every once and a while it gets too full, and those closest to us see the mess that spills out and smell the stink it causes - but we deal with it, cleaning up the worst of it, perhaps dumping out a little of it, and maybe even sticking a "religious-renuzit" on the lid so those who get too close won't realize just how full our can is or how badly it's beginning to smell.

And yet we keep adding to it, little by little. We just keep it close to our hearts so we can slip things in when others aren't looking, and tamp things down if the lid threatens to pop off again.

Sometimes we even let other folks dump their garbage in our can, we store it for them, and if they seem to have forgotten about that garbage we know just where to find it, just in case they need to be reminded about how rotten their garbage was.

We may even feel good about being the garbage can for our family and friends 'cause we're useful and needed. Every messy situation needs a dumpster you know!

The thing is, keeping a garbage can close to my heart, for myself, or for others, can result in a very negative outlook on life. Let's face it most folks don't store precious pearls in a garbage can. Not much fresh fruit gets stored in there either.

The worst thing is, when garbage isn't handled properly it can become a landfill. We don't want to live life without a garbage can, but we really don't want to live next to a landfill either...let alone live life in the middle of one.

A garbage can is very necessary. But we need to be wise in what we receive, we need to recognize that some garbage can be recycled into something useful, and we need to remember to empty and clean the can frequently!

Are you living life with your own personal garbage can full of hurts and offenses? If you're unsure ask yourself this question: "When is the last time someone offended me?" Do you have an answer? Does a face (or faces) come to mind? Are some of the offenses from the past week, month, year, decade? If you can remember who offended you and when and what about, chances are you've been storing that in your own personal garbage can.

Store it too long and the hurts and offenses can become toxic; a poison that invades your life - body, mind, and soul.

Do yourself and those you love a favor. Start talking to God about your garbage! Ask Him to help you dump that trash once and for all. Ask Him to show you what can be recycled into something useful, even beautiful. Ask Him to help you get rid of the garbage on a daily basis.

A dear friend once said "It is as if God puts a beautiful white tablecloth over the trash can of our hearts and helps us deal with the 'garbage' we have stored there one issue at a time." Only my friend didn't call it garbage, she called it by its real name - sin. That's usually what we like to keep in the trash cans of our hearts, the stuff we haven't forgiven others for, the stuff we haven't forgiven ourselves for. The stuff we have placed aside to keep for ourselves instead of placing it at the foot of the cross for God to deal with once and for all.

There's an old hymn that talks about being washed "whiter than snow". January is a good month to understand that word picture! It's also a good month to allow God to wash the garbage cans we've been storing our hurts in, "whiter than snow, yes whiter than snow, now wash me and I will be whiter than snow!"

"Lord Jesus I long to be perfectly whole;

I want Thee forever to live in my soul,

Break down every idol, cast out every foe;

Now wash me and I shall be whiter than snow.

Whiter than snow, yes whiter than snow;

Now wash me and I shall be whiter than snow."

James Nicholson; William G. Fischer

Until next time.

Beth

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Oh how the years go by. As I look back on 2009 and ask "what do I have to show for my time?" a few things stand out:

There is the obvious; the kids are growing, healthy and strong. It's been a busy year, but a great year. Plenty of opportunities for "Ma, Pa, and the youngin's" to be together, sharing the course of our lives, which results in multiplied joy for me!

Then there are the things I have to look a little harder for; the things that have become a part of my life where, when I take a closer look, I can see answered prayer:

I have been writing a blog every week since the Circle of Friends devotional/blog launch began in February. Perhaps a prayer I prayed for discipline has been answered?

In April I made the decision to join a twelve week study entitled "The Truth Project" (for more information go to www.thetruthproject.org). In case you're wondering, twelve weeks, in my world, is a very long time. That's three months of committing to a study, three busy months of setting time aside. It was time well spent, so well spent that hubby and I decided to host the same study in our home. Twelve weeks later we could hardly believe it was over and are looking forward to hosting it again in 2010. Without a doubt my prayer for personal growth and intentional time spent studying God's word was answered.

I have had the opportunity to be a part of a daily radio program for the past year. (Fortunately for me it is pre-recorded which allows for a weeks worth of programs to be recorded in one afternoon - that suits my schedule quite well, thank you!) And, once again, it was answered prayer. I asked God to help me encourage folks in their daily walk with Him, which just happens to be the goal of our morning program on 95.9. Thank you God for the opportunities You give!

And then there is the very act of prayer. Something we tend to talk about but often find ourselves so caught up in the busy-ness of life that we find little time for intentional time spent in prayer. A year ago several opportunities came up for me to participate in weekly prayer time for our school children and the adults who impact their lives. More answered prayer!

God is so good. Yes, the year flew by, but as I look back I recognize His hand of provision all over it! When we ask Him to provide it may not always be in the way we anticipate but He is faithful to provide in the way that is best for us.

I can't wait to see what He has in store for 2010!

Until next time.
Beth

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The New Year is upon us. The start of a new year means different things to different people.

For some it is a whole new beginning; a fresh start that they've been looking forward to.

For others it is yet another step closer to the end, the end of an era, the end of a life, but an end all the same.

For some it's the end of a year that they are ready to be done with. For others it is the end of the year of a lifetime. Some anticipate it, some dread it.

How 'bout you? Where do you find yourself in these final days of 2009?

Have you thought about your plans for 2010? Have you taken time to identify your walnuts (God's will for your life) and examine your rice? (the busy-ness of life?)

May I be so bold to choose your #1 walnut for the coming year: Read God's word!

For those who are already doing so, consider switching it up this year - read from a new translation, or if you've been reading from a modern day translation, read from the King James Version this year. Ask God to help you understand what you're reading and how it applies to your life. Ask God to speak Truth from His word into your everyday busy-ness. He delights in our search to grow in our relationship with Him!

If you are thinking "I've tried that, I didn't understand it, why bother wasting my time" think on this: Do you understand how the water from an aquifer deep below the earth's surface gets into the pipes that connect to your sink? Really? Do you understand how it gets cleaned and purified before it cleans your clothes, your dishes, and your body? Really?

Do you understand, really understand, how putting the gas nozzle in that little hole transfers fuel from the pump to your vehicle and in turn works with all the pieces and parts in the engine to get you where you need to go? Really?

Do you fully understand how flipping a switch on the wall lights up a dark room? Do you understand that whole "energy conversion" process? Really?

And if you don't understand it do you still use it or do you say "I don't understand it so I'm not even going to try to use it!"

Honestly, God's word is at times a mystery to me. Yet even when I don't fully understand it, I still know that when it's in me it changes me, it cleans and purifies me - my thoughts, my desires - it works with all the parts in my life to get me where I need to be. It lights me up, even during the darkest days. What I do understand is life changing for me, and what I don't understand I choose to take by faith.

Give it a try, choose this year - 2010 - to read God's word each and every day. Make it a walnut in your life. And if you miss a day, don't give up! It's a bit like starting a diet - a spiritual diet - if you miss a day on your diet you don't stop eating 'til January 1 of the following year! Same with reading God's word, if you miss a day don't think you need to wait until next year to start reading again!

Reading God's word is spiritual nutrition for our souls! We must ingest nutrients in order to live a healthy physical life, otherwise we will be malnourished. We must read God's word to live a healthy spiritual life; otherwise we will be spiritually malnourished.

If you search "one year Bible" you can print a daily reading guide. (and if you use www.goodsearch.com for your search engine you can support Circle of Friends Ministries of Sugarcreek, Ohio in the process!)

There are many Bibles designed especially for this purpose. Whether you choose to use your own Bible with a reading guide or a specific one year devotional type Bible is simply your personal preference. Choose whatever works best for you - but choose, this day, to allow God's word to work in your life, in your heart, and in your soul. Really!

Until next time.

Beth

Psalm 119:105, "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path." (NIV)

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Excitement reigns at the Beechy house!

Only three more days 'til CHRISTMAS - the Baby will finally be in place on the Advent Calendar! The secrets that have been kept for the past month will finally be opened!

Only two more days 'til Christmas Eve and the Christmas Eve services at church - the music of Christmas, the message of Christmas, the hope, the joy, the Reason for the Season!

And only one more day 'til all the chicks are back in the nest and all the beds are full again! I don't know who is more excited, my kids, or me.

I love having all of our family home. I love the full house, the busy kitchen, the sound of the washing machine running endlessly (absence really does make the heart grow fonder!), the laughter, the joy.

I love the family gatherings that happen during the Christmas season. Spending time with my sister and her family, her grandbabies make up for the lack of babies at our house these days! Spending Christmas day at Grandpa Bob and Grandma Esther's house (still my favorite in-laws in the whole wide world!) with laughter, joy, and a round or two, or three, of Hungarian Rummy (who will be the grand champ this year? Stacy again - or will a new champion be crowned?). Peg's pies, Ashleigh's cookies, and, new sis-in-law, Kristen is sure to find her holiday cooking nitch!

I love the cards we receive, the Christmas letters that catch us up to date. The family pictures - we even received an ultrasound picture, what a great way to announce the coming of the newest sweet Bartow baby!

I love the songs, the lights, and the excitement in our kids.

I love the fact that God chose a very strange way to save the world. And I love that my friend Lisa recorded that very song this Christmas for all of us to ponder and enjoy.

A strange way, a very strange way, to save the world; that the God of the universe, Creator of Heaven, earth, and everything in it, chose to come to earth as a babe; to humble Himself, to walk the paths He knew we would walk, all to make way for our salvation, for a life spent in fellowship with Him, and for the promise of eternity.

As you celebrate His birth may you pause to reflect on the Father's great love for you!

JOY TO THE WORLD THE LORD HAS COME LET EARTH RECEIVE HER KING!

Until next time,
Beth

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The tree is finally up. I was beginning to think it might not happen this year. Too many basketball games to attend seemed to be resulting in too little time to decorate the house.

But then it happened. I had a day at home. Alone. YEA! I can accomplish so much on those quiet days. And having accomplished much I can now enjoy the delight I see in my kid's eyes as the Christmas lights reflect in their eyes and spirit. They've been counting down the days on the Advent calendar since December 1, but there is something about having the tree in place that stirs their excitement in that beautiful childlike way.

I'm a bit nostalgic this year, perhaps due to the oldest child being on her own. My chicks are starting to leave the nest - which is good, don't get me wrong! - I took some time to go back and look at some Christmas pictures from the past. Most are in photo albums but some are stored on the computer - which makes it much easier to share those memories.

Merry Christmas from the Beechy's thru the years:

Until next time.

Beth

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Are you ready for another confession from this peace lover?

Here it is: There was a time when keeping everyone "happy" was my number one goal. And then there came a time that I realized that my goal of keeping everyone, including my hubby and kids, happy (all of them at the same time ALL the time please) was impossible.

You know what I learned in the midst of that journey? A very important truth: If my goal is to keep those I love happy we will all be miserable from the work it entails and the self-centered focus it results in. Yet if my goal is to see them healthy, happiness tends to follow.

That truth follows every aspect of our lives, physically, emotionally and spiritually. It affects us in body, mind and soul.

It's true at play, at school, at work, at church, in hobbies, in ministry, in grocery as well as Christmas shopping, in surfing the web, in physical exercise, in sports, in everything!

Pursue good health: healthy relationships, healthy thoughts; healthy habits, healthy choices, and happiness tends to follow!

What keeps us from being healthy? In John 5 Jesus asks the question of the paraplegic by the pool "Do you want to be healthy?" The man answered with all the reasons why he couldn't get there, to which Jesus replied ".pick up your mat and walk!"

Have you ever done that in your own life? Do you ever take time to stop and look at an area of your life that you know isn't healthy and find yourself listing the reasons why it is the way it is? Ever take a peak at the areas that you're hoping no else notices? (For insight into that area read Janet Stutzman's "CLOSET" devotionals - to read them all click on the 'Janet Stutzman' label) Typically those are the areas where you are stuck doing the same unhealthy thing over and over again.

I have been there; at times I'm still there.

The answer is the same for me.

DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! Pick up "your mat" and walk! Ask someone to help you walk, but walk! Find someone to walk with you, someone to help you recognize and change the unhealthy habits that have led to the impossible place you find yourself in.

I believe healthy relationships are essential in keeping us motivated toward healthy living in every area of our lives. Show me a person who is unhealthy in most any area of their life and I will show you a person who has put a barrier up around that area and is not allowing anyone to go there.

I'm not talking about the person with the "named" disease. Honestly I believe there are people with cancer who are "healthier" than those of us with unhealthy lifestyle habits! I think of my friend Cheryl. When diagnosed with cancer one of the first things she did was let her family and friends know, and those same people walked beside her thru that journey. She would tell you her healthy relationships were essential in the midst of her physical unhealthiness.

What keeps us from asking for help? Fear? Pride? Shame? Fatigue? Previous hurt? The reasons can be many but the outcome is the same: isolation and defeat. The evil one would keep us separated from one another because he knows there is strength in numbers. It is why isolation is used as a form of punishment in prisons; as a form of torture in war. When we isolate ourselves it is yet another unhealthy choice that will keep us in the defeated place we are in. We are hiding, and when we hide no one can help us.

Help usually begins with a relationship. First and foremost with God thru the person of Jesus Christ, and then with the healthy relationships He has planned for our lives. Look around you, who has God placed in your life to encourage your health? It may be a medical doctor, a professional counselor; it may simply be a good friend to speak truth into your life, hold you accountable and study God's word with you to see what He has to say about the subject.

The very goal of keeping everyone happy drove me to that point of hiding. I was stuck within seeing distance of the "answer" but I was too ashamed to actually do anything about it. After all "what would people think if they knew I needed help in this area?"

God knew I'd be there someday. He planned healthy relationships for my life even before I realized I needed them. He's like that you know. Always looking out for our health - knowing that happiness, and even flat out joy, will follow!

A healthy relationship with our heavenly Dad is a life that leads to something much greater than happiness - it is a life filled with joy, with contentment, with peace, even in the midst of the battle called life.

A healthy relationship with our heavenly Dad tends to impact the health of our relationships with our earthly friends.

Healthy relationships with our earthly friends in turn affect our personal health, physically, emotionally and spiritually.

And happiness really does follow a healthy body, mind and soul.

Until next time.

Beth

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December 1, 2009.how did this happen? Where did January, February, March, and the rest of the months get to? As I have said before, if time flies when you're having fun we must be having a blast!

December is a month full of activity and preparation at our house. Secrets are already being kept, lots of list making has taken place, the advent calendar has been hung and Christmas songs are being sung.

Eight-year-old Clay is in the school Christmas play; we have heard ALL the songs AND every speaking part (his and everyone else's) again and again. To say he is into this play would be a huge understatement.

December is also a month that basketball gets plenty of space on our calendar. Oldest daughter Leah is a first-year coach for eighth grade girls in the district she teaches in, first game is Thursday night! College daughter Krista is in her senior year of playing basketball, her season started two weeks ago. Sixteen-year-old Emily's high school season starts tomorrow, and 6^th grader Megan has been playing on Saturdays since the last week of October.

I did the math: four daughters on four teams equal 74 games between October 31 and February 20. (All I want for Christmas is a seat cushion!)

Clay has been to more girls' basketball games than any little boy I know. The year he was born Leah was in her second year of high school ball and Krista played on the 8^th grade team. He was born in January so his first outings were to church and basketball games.

He's decided to play soccer.

And he'd like guitar lessons too, please.

Anything but basketball for this little brother, I keep telling him what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. He is pretty sure he's going to be one strong young man.

And while all this basketball makes him a little crazy he still loves his big sisters.

Until next time,

Beth

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The walnut and rice jar has taken a prominent place in our home as a constant reminder to choose well.

I have given these jars as gifts before, yet have never kept one for myself. What's up with that?

When I give a jar as a gift I attach a note card with these words:

In this jar are twenty-one walnuts and two cups of rice. The walnuts represent God's plan for our lives; the rice is symbolic of our own desires and plans. If the rice goes in the jar first, the walnuts will never fit. But if the walnuts are placed in first, the rice can be poured over and around the walnuts with plenty of room.

So it is with each day and each life. If my plans come first, the plans God has for me will never fit. But if I allow God to shape my plans and give them their rightful place each day in my life, He has a way of making certain my plans fit in too. (author unknown)

"But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you." Matthew 6:33

I wonder if God knew that folks like me would need a "visual" of that verse someday.

I wonder if He chuckled when He created the walnut tree and the rice plant.

Until next time,

Beth

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Who knew that a ten minute conversation with my kids could grow into such a thought provoking couple of weeks for me? In a simple attempt to give Megan and Clay a visual, regarding what is important for our health and growth (physically, emotionally and spiritually) and what has little or no lasting value, I have begun re-examining my own life in a whole new way.

This week I looked long and hard at the "rice"; the stuff of life that really has no long-lasting value.

I tried to tell myself that cleaning the house was rice.

It's not.

Living in filth and disorder as opposed to living in cleanliness and order has long-lasting value, physically, emotionally and spiritually, at least for me. A cluttered house leaves in its wake a cluttered mind. A cluttered mind impacts every area of my life.

A clean house is one of my walnuts.

I had really, really, hoped that exercise was rice - please?

It's not. Oh nuts! (walnuts to be exact!)

Are you ready for the confessions of this peace lover.my rice..say it ain't so..my rice, most often, comes in the form of a computer screen and keyboard.

Hi, my name is Beth, and I am a computer-junkie.

I thought about using the word internet instead of computer, but I don't even need the internet to sit and waste time in front of the computer. Give me "Picture It" - ohhhh, fun stuff! Give me "Microsoft Works" task options - especially household management ideas (I can drown my rice with thoughts of "I'm helping the family"!).

And (shame covers my face) give me spider solitaire...please, just one more game, oh shucks, I know I can win - I'll replay the same game.

And I haven't even clicked on Google yet to take me to the web.that exciting place of sale ads, news stories, and facebook....

Yup, my rice, pretty white stuff that it is, the fluffy stuff that tends to take the place of the walnuts in my life, most often parks itself in our computer room.

It wasn't always this way. I use to have other "flavors" of rice.

I can remember back - before kids - when television lured me from my "walnuts". Whether it was "Jeopardy" or "The Days of Our Lives" didn't really matter, it was a show I NEEDED to watch, and so the other stuff just had to wait. (I'll have some rice, please.)

Another ricey-filler was reading novels by authors that filled my mind with stuff it didn't need to be filled with. Reading is good, but not all reading material is good.

There was even a time when the telephone kept me from other important stuff of life. Chatting with friends became my life-line, and while chatting with friends is not bad in and of itself, I was filling my day with it and not being intentional about other things that were important. As a result, many of my "walnuts" were not making it into my "jar".

The day finally came when I knew I needed to not allow myself to answer the phone before I spent time in God's word. (And yes I got up each morning and read my Bible, first thing, so I would be free to answer the phone, right activity for the wrong reason.we'll talk more about that another day =) It was a step, no matter how small, in the right direction.

Looking back, and remembering how I recognized those "rice-filled" areas and found a way to conquer them, I know it's possible to do it again!

The most important thing to remember about rice it that a cup or two is ok, it really is! It's just when it takes over your life, when you find yourself allowing it to take the place of what is most important, that it becomes detrimental to your health - physically, emotionally and spiritually.

If you have a rice-filled life, if your daily jar has lots of rice and just a couple of walnuts, may I make a suggestion? Tell a friend. And give your friend permission to ask you how you're doing with your walnuts and with your rice.

It's called accountability.

And the long-term effect is a changed life, a healthier life - physically, emotionally, and spiritually!

My accountability pals are my "quality control", they make sure the mix of walnuts and rice is beneficial to my health, just as I do for them. It is an intentional relationship that helps me find balance, helps me discern walnuts from the rice, and helps me remember what is most important.

And that is a jar full of good stuff!

Until next time.

Beth

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If you follow this blog you'll remember that last week we looked at the lesson of the "Walnut and Rice Jar" and how it applied to my kid's lives. This week I've been using the practical application of determining my priorities (walnuts) and seeing if I am living out what I say is most important to me, or if I'm allowing the other stuff of life (rice) to distract me and fill my minutes, hours, and days (my jar) with non-essentials.

I thought it would be so easy, I mean how hard can it be to prioritize your priorities? But taking a good hard look at my "walnuts" this week has been rather stretching, and stretching is not always easy! Just as in physical stretching, this spiritual stretching stuff has left me a bit tender in spots.

I mean, I know that I know that I know that my top three priorities ARE, without a doubt, God, my hubby, and my family. And yet I have had to ask myself "are they the top three in terms of time spent in intentional relationship?" Are those "walnuts" getting into my "jar", each and every day?

And if not, why not?

What could possibly be so important to distract me from my top priorities? Another walnut/priority? Or could it be rice/the stuff of life?

And so, this week, the challenge for me has been to name - really name, I mean literally take a marker and write the NAME of the priority on a walnut - the important stuff of life. And then to, again literally, pick up the walnut and put it in my jar when, and if, I actually do invest my minutes, my hours, my self, in and with the name on the walnut.

And I haven't even gotten to the rice!

Three of my walnuts I mentioned before, time spent with God, time spent with my husband, and time spent with my children. But I really need to define those priorities a little better.

It is not just time spent WITH, but time spent IN relationship/communication with God (in reading His word, and by prayer and quiet, meditative time); time spent IN relationship/communication with my husband (sleeping together in the same room does not count as communication!); time spent IN relationship/communication with my kids (being in the same house is time spent, but, honestly, that is not communication =).

Are you recognizing the point I recognized? Sometimes we think just seeing someone is time well spent - put a checkmark by that priority - but seeing a face does not grow a relationship.

Communication, intentional communication, is what grows us relationally, with God and with those we say mean the very most to us. It's the stuff those walnuts are made of!

And at the end of the day, at the end of our life, it's relationships that will matter most.

The other "walnuts" on my list aren't "bad", work, reading, friends, exercise, eating right, hobbies, ministry, all are priorities for me that help to keep me well-grounded, well-balanced, and healthy. But it's the walnuts that involve relationships with those I hold dear that really matter the most.

So yes, it's okay to have a walnut that reads "lunch with a friend", and yet it's not ok to fill my jar with those lunch-walnuts if my walnuts that read "God", "hubby", "family" are not getting placed in my jar as well. It's okay to have a job-walnut; it's not okay to fill my jar with that particular walnut to the point that the other "walnuts" in my life don't find their way into the jar.

It's great to read, it's important to study God's word, it's great to attend group studies, to serve in ministry, to have hobbies and go to ballgames and concerts and any other number of things that might be on my list of priorities - my walnuts - but the whole visual of the walnuts being put into the jar, seeing how I am spending my time, has been an important reminder to me about the need for balance, discernment, and being intentional about what is most important.

Relationship with my Heavenly Father, intentional relationship, will help me find the balance, help me discern the walnuts from the rice, and help me be intentional about what is most important.

So there you have it, I've named the first and most important walnut for each and every one of us. If we can, if we will, place the God-walnut in our jar FIRST each and every day, I have a feeling the rest of the walnuts will fit even better!

Next week I think I'll look at the nice fluffy rice that's been stealing some space from those all important walnuts!

And truly, it will be "confessions" of a peace lover! (I am nervous already!)

Until then..

Beth

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